‘Divorce’ has a negative connotation to it. It typically means families are breaking apart, there’s tension in the air, and people are unhappy. Definitely, divorce is an unfavourable life event and is one that married couples seek to avoid. However, there are instances where is it beneficial for those involved, as it might be the best way out of an unhealthy environment.
A huge part of divorce is children. When young, they are extremely vulnerable and are easily influenced. If they were in an environment of constant conflicts, violence and abuse, then it is best the parents get a divorce to save them from a possible lifetime of trauma and psychological damage.
Children can become more self-sufficient because they can no longer rely or depend as much on their parents, who might not always be around or are not in the right frame of mind to be ‘good’ parents. They learn to be more independent and take care of themselves, as it’s the only choice they have.
This trait will be ingrained into them as they grow up, and will help them in many respects in their adult lives.
Because they went through an emotional experience themselves, children tend to be more empathetic towards those who are experience similar events in their lives. They know what it’s like to feel neglected and receive less love and care from their parents.
They are also more understanding and will tend to care more for others.
Someone who goes through hardship will be tougher and stronger than someone who doesn’t. This is a natural fact of life. Similarly, children who underwent hard times during their parents divorce will grow up to be more resourceful and adaptable. They are in a situation where they have to develop strategies to deal with the emotional and psychological aspects of divorce.
Since they overcame these obstacles at a young age, they grow up to be more resilient later on in life. They are also less likely to take good family relations for granted since they experienced first hand what it would be like to be a child of divorce.
- They value relationships
Children of divorce understand that it takes effort to make a relationship work. They therefore have a stronger understanding of what it takes to make relationships/marriages work. This makes them more conscientious in their future marriage.
Furthermore, they feel a sense of accomplishment if they are in healthy marriages, because they feel that they succeeded where their parents failed. This gives them a sense of pride as they are different from their parents.
Lastly, they also treasure their time spent with loved ones because they know that it is essential to make any relationship work. This brings another benefit in the sense that these children get to know their parents a lot better, since they are spending time with them individually rather than as a whole family.
From the points above, we can see that divorce does not have to necessarily be a bad thing for children. There will be tough times that they will go through, but the bright side is that they come out of it knowing their parents better, and treasure relationships more. They also become more resilient and adaptable individuals due to the circumstances they experienced when young.