Of the many problems couples face in marriage, infidelity or affairs could be listed as one of, if not the worst of them all. Divorce lawyers in Singapore face this all the time. It causes huge arguments, distrust and anger. It rocks the foundations of a good marriage.
However, an affair doesn’t necessarily mean a marriage is over. Firstly, what is an affair, or more commonly known as ‘cheating’ ? Is sending flirty texts to a member of the opposite sex considered cheating?
For me personally, cheating is when you have to hide it. If you do not want your partner to find out, or if they’ll get upset if they do, then you’re already there.
This strict definition of cheating comes from the fact that it is easy to get carried away. Flirty texts can lead to an invitation to dinner, which can lead to more dates, and eventually feelings will escalate, leading to full-blown affairs.
To a certain extent, defining infidelity depends on the people and the circumstances. Many married women consider an emotional affair by their husband, where there is an emotional connection without physical intimacy, to be a much more threatening form of infidelity than one with sexual relations.
This is because sexual acts can be a one-off event. Hiring escort services can be just a one-off event, but emotional affairs can go on for years. Husbands with mistresses are often willing to spend a lot of time and money on them, and will obviously do whatever they can to keep it a secret from their families. And because they are emotionally attached to the 3rd party, they might even agree to a divorce initiated by their wives just to be with their new found love.
Moving on, couples should focus more on solving the issue at hand, and not get carried away with blaming each other or arguing about other matters. Arguments are rarely beneficial and do not contribute to the solution finding process. Regaining trust and making the marriage work again is a long and tedious path, but one that can be very rewarding. Do not make decisions when under stress or under a lot of emotions. These emotionally-charged decisions often end up in regret. Cry when its time to cry, and decide when its time to decide. There is no hurry to make a decision.
However, things are not so simple. It takes 2 hands to clap, and the cheating spouse must acknowledge their mistake, apologize and promise to make amends. A marriage can only work if both parties want it to work. If the cheating spouse does not feel remorseful, or is indifferent to his/her partner’s feelings, then a divorce could be the best solution to the problem.
At the end of the day, you have to take time and not admit defeat right away, unless you have been keeping up with such behavior for a while. Divorce is a huge issue, and the effects will be felt for a lifetime. Take time to think things through, and when you feel that you’re absolutely ready to divorce, then proceed. You can find a divorce lawyer in singapore here via LawyerSearch.